Batusi

Frankly, I thought The Dark Knight was overrated — I tend to tune out during car chases — and too long. But I am still plunking my money down for the next one, because I am desperate for an entertaining blockbuster that my husband will agree to see with me.

It's basically the only way to forget that it's 100 degrees outside on those 100-degree days.

That and iced chai.

But why does everything have to be so dark all the time? We've been catching up on the campy Adam West Batman tv series, and there is a lot to be said for its arch humor — in fact, Psychobabble says it better than I could, here.

Batusi is what I would wear as an extra on Batman, preferably during a dance scene.

Archive photo

Or I could be a guest villain!

Archive photo

My name would be Gamma Ray Gourmet, and I would make lots of food-related quips. (Feel free to add your own in the comments.)

In my intro scene:

"I've got a beef... with Batman!"

Conferring with my henchmen:

"The proof of my perjurious and perfidious plan... is in the pudding!"

On the phone with Gordon:

"Let's talk turkey, Police Commissioner Gordon!"

When I've got Batman headed to his near-certain demise:

"Four and twenty Batmans baked in a pie!"

During my inevitable arrest:

"I guess I'm getting my just desserts!"

(Which — nerd digression — is actually "just deserts," as the word "desert" in this context means "what you deserve," but everyone thinks of it as ending up with the dessert you've earned over... the course of dinner?... and Gamma Ray Gourmet couldn't care less about such distinctions.)

And I would shoot gamma rays all over everything to justify my radioactive outfit.

And I would do the Batusi. (This photo is right before I do the Batusi.)

And obviously I would iron Batusi before filming, because the wrinkles it picks up are just absolutely ridiculous.

And I would have a stylist find me a belt that didn't look bizarre.

And the fancy beaded decoration gets its own closeup. Or I walk.

Most photos by Claire Loeb!

(later on)

I cannot believe I forgot to include this important Batman-related piece of social history. No Adam West, but you can't have everything...